Maybe the condoms are too small she comments; we should buy XL ones. We get to her place that night and things start getting hot, we finally strip naked and I get the condom out. Credit: We found 15 of the most cringe-worthy How-I-Lost-My-Virginity stories on Reddit, and they’re pretty hard to read. Introducing ... PEOPLE's Products Worth the Hype.
As with most sites that thrive on social interaction, Reddit is addictive and time-consuming.
It was a triple-thick desensitizing lubricated condom for guys with stamina problems.”, “She was on top of me, we were on her bed, the door was on the opposite wall behind her.
Funny, Hospital, Silly, Tech Support, USA | Right | October 30, 2020 Back in the day, one of my customers was the cafeteria at a local hospital. And you're a funny little man too!' While many social media sites battle it out to establish their cultural importance, Reddit doesn’t need to; The numbers speak for themselves. I curated these funny stories from funny Tumblr stories. At the end of every shift, they would run reports on those long folio folded perforated ledger sheets with the green and white stripes. I figured I just had to be gay.
From our second floor room, we can see two or three police cars streaming into the parking lot. Later we sexed, and it was glorious.”, “I was getting hot and heavy with my girlfriend when my buddy called wanting to hang out. See how your stories compare with these with these funny short stories you can share with the whole family. She rented a cheap motel room for us. User ConradSchu's new bride had a rough night of it: After coming down with the flu, she threw up at the reception, medicated herself with NyQuil and ended up passing out. "Married people of Reddit, what went wrong at your wedding? All over people’s bags, some of my clothes that were on the floor, my bed and the floor. We may earn commission from links on this page, but we only recommend products we back.
Then, after we shared a post-sex kiss. If you would like to opt out of browser push notifications, please refer to the following instructions specific to your device and browser: 15 People Open Up About the Cringe-Worthy Ways They Lost Their Virginities. Get ready for a hurricane of LOL as you read all these funny short stories. Reddit is one of the few still-used modern day message boards. Heather Finn is the content strategy editor at Good Housekeeping, where she heads up the brand's social media strategy and covers entertainment news on everything from ABC's 'The Good Doctor' to Netflix's latest true crime documentaries. As the night wears on, he gets weirder and weirder.
I don’t smoke, but I had a pack of mini-cigars for when I hang outside with people that do smoke.
(I was robbed of the opportunity to get cake smushed in my face.)". Maybe the third time isn't always the charm: The magistrate at DiffidentDissident's wedding called her by her husband's ex-girlfriend's name three separate times throughout the ceremony. In just a few clicks, scrolls, and refreshes, you can find yourself logging hours on the site.
This is a collection of stories teachers have emailed me that started with posts from the Teachers.net Primary Education chat board (which has since been divided into separate grade levels). these 12 brave souls shared their biggest — … © 2020 Complex Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Thankfully, the user's three uncles were able to pay for one tuxedo each and save the day. I had a little cut just below my head that was bleeding a little.
After rolling off, we saw blood everywhere.
". I went into the bathroom and checked myself out.
The website layout is bare bones-—no shiny new layout that changes every six months (although Reddit did change its front page in 2017 for the first time), no frequent upgrades or “must have” features pushed on users. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io, The Adorable Way Hoda Met Her Fiancé Joel, 45 of the Wildest Wedding Moments in History, Why Steve Carell's Wife Nancy Looks So Familiar, Happy Couples Use These Techniques When They Argue, Talking Politics Can Make Partners Stronger, My New Boyfriend Met My Parents Over Video Chat, Savannah Guthrie and Michael Feldman’s Love Story. So, not only was it my first time, but I also couldn’t FEEL anything.
Text us for exclusive photos and videos, royal news, and way more. Some things just aren't meant to be, like the lighting of user straitsofdire's unity candle. Someone on the board came up with the idea to post the funniest classroom stories, and what follows are hilarious TRUE tales from classrooms all across America that […] But there was one little problem: She had never told the couple she had bought them.
As we’re laying there, basking in the afterglow and each other’s warmth, we hear them. After another hour or so, they all left. I had gone limp by then, but I assume it was just flowing out when I was erect, hence the fluid sensation.”, “My story starts awesome, then gets awkward, then goes back to awesome.
"No" was not the answer the 4-year-old flower girl wanted to hear when she asked Zen_Drifter's wife if she could walk down the aisle with her. Since it was her first time, she bled everywhere.
User local gyro's mother-in-law burst into tears when the newlyweds didn't use the engraved toasting goblets she had gotten them. At user wekiva's daughter's wedding, the ceremony's officiant got drunk and ran his car in to the catering truck. Take these Reddit users' stories, for example: When asked "Married people of Reddit, what went wrong at your wedding?" We end up getting a ride back to her place from the vampire and she invites him in.
He then, "made a crack about taking each other off life support. So after fooling around with my GF for a few weeks she finally hints that she’s ready to go for it tonight, and that I should buy some condoms. I told her I was going to go outside and have a smoke. Get push notifications with news, features and more. Though it started as a website that people didn’t really talk about publicly or in mixed company, Reddit now boasts over 1.66 billion users, and approximately 1.2 million subreddits (like I said, a subreddit for everything).
To save money, user HalBriston opted to create an iTunes playlist for his reception instead of spending extra on a DJ.
The DJ at his wedding was dumped the night before the ceremony, and she only played break-up songs at the reception.
11 Hilarious Stories That Prove Kids Are Out to Embarrass Their Parents ... one redditor posed the question, "Parents on Reddit, ... 'Thank you. What made you laugh the hardest in your entire life?
Dude doesn’t back down. From celebrity threads, where people can ask anything (AMA’s), to threads where people post new information they’ve learned that day (Today I Learned, or TIL), it’s easy to see why its users seem to be addicted to the site. ", User thursday_13 writes that there was a series of unfortunate events at his wedding. Police sirens. He’s down to buy minors booze, and we proceed to party. I figured it was due to anxiety that I didn’t get the pleasure out of it.
The thread, which originated with Reddit user mctugmutton, asked the military community for “the funniest thing they witnessed while in boot camp.”
With the vampire gone, I return to her room and she asks me to sleep with her, not in the sexy way.
Take these Reddit users' stories, for example: When asked "Married people of Reddit, what went wrong at your wedding?"
We watch, frozen, as the cops exit their vehicles and barge in to a first floor room below us. He goes full creeper, trying to make out with her, telling me we can have a three-way.
It also seems, however, that that's hardly ever the case. The reaction photo, seen below, is absolutely priceless. That one is not going on either, and I’m standing there with a boner in one hand, unrolled condom in the other muttering apologies and feeling absolutely ridiculous. The only thing I’m thinking about is, ‘Oh my god, I must be gay.’ I thought I was bi this whole time because I’ve always found myself attracted to women more so than men, but here I am having sex with a woman and I can’t feel ANYTHING! We found 15 of the most cringe-worthy How-I-Lost-My-Virginity stories on Reddit, and they’re pretty hard to read. We end up running into this eccentric guy who tells us he’s a vampire, and 400+ years old, even though he looked to be in his mid 20s. I run to the pharmacy after work and am faced with 20 different types of condoms, I just grab the normal type and try not to seem too nervous while paying. “I had sex with this girl who didn’t tell me she was married.”, “In 11th grade I threw a party because my parents were gone for the weekend.
Just ask user berlinblades. Like, I couldn’t feel my penis.
Good Housekeeping participates in various affiliate marketing programs, which means we may get paid commissions on editorially chosen products purchased through our links to retailer sites. After a few minutes I am panicking because the condom will not go on and am mortified that I look like an idiot who can’t even put on a condom. these 12 brave souls shared their biggest — and most hilarious — wedding fails. 21 Pumpkin Faces to Carve or Design This Halloween, 75 Creative Couple Halloween Costumes for Any Duo, 40+ Seriously Cute Halloween Cupcake Ideas, 32 Epic '80s Costumes to Try This Halloween, This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. It ended up getting out of hand with over 100 people showing up. You'll get the latest updates on this topic in your browser notifications. Jesse Herzog. She passed out covered in her own blood and bleach.
With as much planning that goes into weddings, it seems they should go off without a hitch. Reddit is one of the few still-used modern day message boards. I took some friends and a girl that I liked down there to drink.
Having never used a condom before but not wanting to show it, I casually try to keep up conversation while I’m struggling with all my might to put the damn thing on. His Explanation to the Judge was Golden. He worked hard to put the songs in just the right order for the event, with the first dance song followed by Paul Simon's "Father and Daughter" for the father-daughter dance. We left shortly thereafter.”, “The first thing I noticed was that it didn’t feel nearly as awesome as I had imagined. Funny story that terrified my cab driver as text. Yet for most of us, the first time is, well, awkward emotionally, logistically, spiritually, etc. It wasn't until just a few hours before tigerdactyl's wedding that three of the user's brothers, who were all groomsmen, mentioned that they hadn't gotten their tuxedos. After breaking the first one, I kinda excuse myself and walk into the bathroom with a second condom and the instructions. Case in point comes from an awesome AskReddit thread . Why trust us? I didn’t even think to cover up or hide or anything, I was just lying on my back fiddling with my phone while my girlfriend tried to rectify the situation.”, “I went in and thought I came instantly. I had 'unplugged' my mom a couple of years prior. So I go outside and stand there, pretending to inhale, contemplating what life will be like as a gay man.
They've never been good with money, tigerdactyl wrote, but they had almost a year to save up the $80 they needed.
Plus, "the big black headphones and mixer looks cool with a wedding dress.". I flip out and tell him to leave.